FOURTH OF JULY

CELEBRATING AMERICAN TRADITION LIKE THE FOUNDING FATHERS INTENDED:

 A HOW TO- BY FAME💋

The weekend started off with white claws at Montrose beach. A humble day that ended with LSD rooftop pool and pizza(sounds like a birthday party for a 5th grader at the Latin School). Spent the night asleep on the couch watching stranger things. like I said, humbled. 

The next day begins with a wake up and brunch- I will never complain about an over priced breakfast, I simply cannot bear to serve myself food before 6 pm. 

keeps me fed. 

After brunch comes the Fourth of July weekend of any middle-American teenagers dreams. 

Lake House in central Michigan

We stop at arguably the smallest gas station in the entire state of Indiana 5 minutes outside of Gary (Which says a lot considering Indiana LOVES a kitschy gas station). 

We drive 2 hours through corn until we reach a town with...

population: lake house

boats: abundant

trump flags: raised 

underage drinking: in a basement 

golf carts: crashing 

In a town with a BP gas station and dollar general without a single house that didn't touch water, it is safe to assume not a soul resides here when the UV isn't at 6(lowest)

we arrive at the house- 

White Claws: cracked before we can even take our shoes off. 

Before I can finish the first claw and hit a Michigan brand vape I am being buckled into a life vest and put on the back of a jet ski...

It is vital to note- this is the teen movie summer dream of FAME from 6 years ago. I was never brought to a central Michigan lake house, never been on a jet ski, actively avoided boats from the age of nothing to 17... drowned as a child and doesn't like swimming in large bodies of water for longer that 30 seconds. 

I spent my summer vacations hiking on mountains, and off roads in farming vehicles- not on boats

ANYWAY '

 I have barely been able fathom the fact of where I am let alone decide what character Im going to play for the weekend, but Im on a jet ski, so exposed to such large body of water- I am going 35 mph holding onto bestie for dear life. 

bestie is crazy- bestie also grew up in Michigan 

we are lapping circles to create waves and hop them. the jet ski which was once parallel to the water is now tilted a full 90 degrees. I am side-ways, convinced that if I end up in this water, separate from bestie or jetski, I will be dead. No ifs, ands, buts, about it- I will be gone. 

As I am writing this 3 days out- I am still feeling every muscle in my body screaming. If this is what old people feel like Im not lasting that long. 

Once I am off the jet ski and properly motion sick I am playing beer die. Why anyone would think putting a freshly shaken fake 21-19 year old into a game of aim mixed with hand eye coordination... and have the audacity to think it was going to work...

As the White Claws kept flowing, the sun set and white girl ran dry... all through the house every creature was stirring... and slurring. 

The next day became much more sober as the hang overs would not allow much more than sip of water next to a single McDonalds chicken nugget. We take the boat out to the sand bar where we lay on the boat, sit in the sun and hit the vape until the trump flags flying are blurred by the cloud of flavored air. 

Something so picturesque about a middle America summer, yet so tainted by the people who are simultaneously enjoying the same moment. I guess that's celebrating independence. 

There is a lot more I could say about the things that happened this Fourth of July in Chicago. But I cant bear to be angry or heart felt in this blog post where I talk about such light hearted and more than all, privileged things I got to do this weekend. 

Mitch MccOldFuck can suck my dick and he knows what he's done. It is not my job nor place to spread awareness for gun control in this country on my stupid blog- If y'all want political advice or opinions go somewhere else. 

The weekend ended with eating 3 packs of gas station pickles while driving through Gary Indiana for the second time. 

TBH a W 

I am just now coming back to this blog post 2 months later on September 2nd. It has been a long time since this trip to Michigan and it's fair to say that FAME is in a different moment.

She's more of a slut now, back then she was falling back into living Chicago. Now Chicago has settled, traumatized her all over again, and she's back to kicking bullshit around. 

Though I would like to get back into the value in a Typical American Dream Summer Vacation. Something so dreamy about middle-of-nowhere-Hicksville-beer-drinking that is just so pivotal to a summer. Maybe I'm a midwestern girl and I love the trashy shit that this region has to offer- but you gotta shake what your momma gave you when you live in the kind-of landlocked armpit of the US. 

WONDERING- We have Lake Michigan, so does that reap chicago of its so-called LandLocked title given by mfers from the coasts? We have water, its just not an ocean... leave your thoughts in the comments that I don't know how to use. 

Considering this post is from 2 months ago and Im currently supposed to be taking notes on Vietnamese history, Im going to call this post officially OVER

with Love, shake ASS, and go to SCHOOL,

FAME💋

BETHANY IS BACK

IT IS GOING TO BE A BETHANY MOTA FALL 

While summer is not yet over, the fall is creeping in one way after another- the back-to-school season has us all reflecting on what we will make of our fresh start at a new year. 

The resurgence in teens watching shows like The Vampire Diaries(which is being removed from Netflix on September 3rd), Teen Wolf, 10 Things I Hate About You- due to the trend cycle leading us back to Y2K. 

Since 2017, we watched trends in fashion, film, social media, and a general attitude of self display progress at an exponentially faster rate. Reflecting 20 years into the past, With the beginning of the 2020s' we watched Y2K fashion, media, pop culture figures, take the internet by the throat and whip it back and fourth until we couldn't breathe. 

In the past 8 months the early 2010s "indie sleaze" has started to peak through the underground music, fashion scene and by June it had been fully consumed by mainstream media. 

At this point, what the fuckkk does mainstream media even mean?-  at least from my pocket of the internet it(indie sleaze) feels mainstream. like every cunt on my feed is adopting this trend, or does is it only feel this way because I am part of that group? so for the sake of this post, I will be using mainstream as it means in context to my personal internet consumption.

 With this oh-so valuable time of reflection approaching, I think we need to pay homage to the grounding figures in our post 9-11 world childhoods. To vow to never forget them as Y2K falls to Normies

Im thinking Elena Gilbert, in low-waisted boot cut jeans with a fitted henley top-Think Abercrombie, Hollister, Shirtless men with abs that you could stand on. Lorelei Gilmore holding a coffee and wearing a scarf-glove set as a way of staying warm as if that makes any functional sense for a 40 degree Connecticut October.

Though these archetypes REEK of y2k-late nineties music influence they will forever be founding fathers to our development. 

Of course this is nicher than hell and not everyone was watching these shows but simply if you get it you get it and you're real if you do. not sorry

Currently, we find ourselves in an estranged push and pull between Y2K and indie sleaze as the year 2000's trends become more mainstream while indie sleaze remains reserved as a niche(alt) trend. -though when referring to niche/mainstream, it includes millions of teens and early 20's across the world. It is important to recognize that niche no longer exists in an environment where a single tiktok can bring someone from a rich girl from Connecticut to Charli D'amelio. 

While we are in this strange limbo, it is important to acknowledge it, and ride through it. 

Which means, the Tyler Oakley, Bethany Mota Aeropostale collection, glitterforever17 of it all is VALID again. We are taking a moment to heal, and with healing comes over accessorizing ( something both the 00's and 10's pulled off without a hitch) 

We are going to decorate our homes, bedrooms, desks, key rings with festive glam.

If you're a gaudy out-there type cunt, go to home goods and max the credit card.

 If you're a minimalist faggot that only wears 3 colors and decorates with 2, draw a ghost on something or buy an orange hat- Do something... 

2022 is just simply not the year to stop caring about participating in the change of season.

We have monkey pox on our hands - enjoy the shit while we can

its time to fuck off and put glitter on something(everything) like your life depends on it

After 2 years of traumatizing the fuck out of ourselves, we deserve the perfect throwback of what led us to where we are today. 

If you're reading this, you clicked a link in my instagram bio, if you're on my instagram, you either understand my references and why everything I say is valid, or you're a random that reads this shit to make a lousy pickup line in my DMs. 

Going with the former, you know how vital Bethany meta and the season themed bedroom was to our youth. If you are not matching a throw pillow to the bath and body works candle on your night stand you did it wrong. 

At this point we all deserve a little cinnamon scented bullshit to trick our monkey brains into producing a little more serotonin. 

Personally I think fall themed things are gaudy as fuck and simply not my taste- Im not sure I can say I will participate in any of the things I just said, but I liked the way it sounded and I think it would be So cute for everyone else to do. With that being said- y'all know I will fuck up Christmas- getting a real tree this year type-

With Love, Shake Ass, Stay Hypocritical 

FAME💋

L.earning to Love Yourself

 Egos these days 

Im not psychologist but Mfers have the fattest most cunt sucking egos these days.

Simply, please learn to keep that shit to yourself like the rest of us.

Move in silence babe 

*** Ive been wearing the same contacts for days- don’t ask me how many, I don’t know*** 

Fame has so many codes to life that keep her so intelligent and best of all absolutely incomprehensibly mental( not yet sure if the crazy is public perception or self identified)***both***

But If I were to go around spilling that shit yalll would be strutting the same shit- 

That’s a lie y’all could never

"would I ever lie to you"

"________"

When the general affiliated of chicago Learn to pretend to be humble… Hell will crack open out of the basement of the sears tower and we will all trickle in one by one doing an intake appointment with Dr Amen on our way down

Be who you are 

Shake ass like there’s no last night 

If we all pretend- we would be able to create the most ideal, dripping wet world 

With love 

Stay hypocritical 

FAME

back in CHI

if there is one thing being gone has taught me. its my love for chicago vibe

this city is simply real as fuck. everything about the way the people act, talk, treat each other, yell in public, get angry about literally nothing. it so perfect. 

this city has a vomit inducing balance of publicly intoxicated DePaul students, corrupt lawyers, and yuppies going from yacht to wrigleyville bar, all paying too much for a mediocre dinner in Lincoln park. but the difference between chicago and New York... where in nyc all of those groups would hate, avoid each other, and almost rarely mingle- in Chicago they are all part of the same tax bracket. they have no choice but to interact. they all go to the cubs game and storm down clark street in a drunken haze. 

As much as I loved my hiatus from this scary, shot filled city, I need the unfiltered crazy of its people. I live for the most "chicago" things in life. beyond a hot dog or a soupy piece of pizza- I need people getting out of cars at red lights to twerk for the oncoming traffic, I need blunts hot boxing the CTA cars, 

One thing I would cut off a toe to change would be the legal drinking age- Why the FUck could I spend the past 3 months drinking without a single ID check, for cheap... but the second I come back to America its a crime... uhhhh what the actual fuck. I was liberated just to lose it all after a 10 hour flight out of Zurich. 

Okay im done with this blog post its making me sad.. maybe I just post it anyway for shits and giggles. Its so damn short call this shit an instagram caption.

my brain is fat and sexy and im right af for this

 

FAME loses the Love of Her Life

That is such a lie I am about to tell a story about a man that LOVED asking me about myself... how'd he know that was my favorite topic.

I really put my post incriminating information on this blog as if it isn’t literally in my instagram bio. 

Im an honest girl what can I say?

Yesterday I met the most sweet and gorgeous dutch man at the bar…. in the moment he was giving mid.. like I simply did not give a fuck but the flirt was enjoyable. As I left I fully thought that I had gotten his number or given him mine… 

This was not the case. Instead I had not given him any information beside the fact that im from chicago…

I also don’t even know this mans real name cause it was something dutch and unable to pronounce with my stupid American accent so we nicknamed him itchy… 

He was low-key giving ick in the moment, but I simply loved the attention and the way that he was asking my friend for her blessing when I went to the bathroom like holy what the fuck consent. 

because he loved asking so many questions, we somehow ended up on the topic of my student debt and how poverty. He then proceeded to ask me in full confidence((with an awareness of how ignorant he was) I love a self aware man)) 

If I was "TRAILER PARK" 

not if I lived in one, but if I was trailer park- using that shit as an. Adjective- and he thought his English was bad...

I then explained to him that if there were trailer parks in chicago we would die. so instead poor people are just left to die on the street so no one in liable... 

****it really is quiet interesting hearing the perception of America from different people from different parts of the world. which obviously its not good but its fucking hilarious hearing the different nuanced things that people have picked up from the media. 

My ass  had dried blood coming out of my nose. and he was still dtf... 

get you man…

But life goes on, and if im lucky ill see him again. 

All there is left to do is appreciate the confidence boosting that comes with being so highly perceived for hours on end. 

So if anyone out there knows a dutch man with a name that sounds kind of like itchy who was in Berlin on Tuesday June 7th… Send him my way.

And if you are him. Hi bae 

I bowed down to a straight man yesterday…. Like I actually can’t believe 

Don’t get it twisted this was not my dutch boy… fully just a straight man for doing the bare minimum… the audacity of me…

this is a quick post.. I would loooove to go into the rest of the night but im not into self exposure to that severe of a degree. My non existent image simply cant handle it.

With LOVE, shake ASS, find a dutch man at the bar

FAME

Pheremonic Weekend for FAME

THE PHEROMONES THAT CHANGED MY SELF IMAGE: Am I more or less confident? Only god knows…

Friday morning, I wake up with bloody guts… 

This is a part of life that traumatized me so hard as a child, leaving me googling tube tying procedures at the ripe of age of 12. 

I have come to terms with this function, though I will never be like one of those bitches that love getting a period cause it means they’re not preg. I would rather live in fear of pregnancy than have a period ever. 

And don’t tell me to go on birth control, I am not one for altering the natural state of my hormones. 

“Get a copper IUD” 

Ur funny. If a doctor got within 10 feet of me wit an IUD with the intent to insert it in me,, someones getting bit by a 19 year old girl. 

ANYWAY

A brief moment of grief waves over me and my now inconvenienced weekend. 

I go about my day, buy a nice box of German tampons and mourn the chemical warfare that my vagina spent so many years fighting against American chemical filled barely FDA approved tampons.

Over the course of the weekend, I have experienced the male harassment of a lifetime. In all the years I have lived in Chicago, I have never been cat called more than in the 72 hours that I was bleeding in Berlin

It's important to note that when I got here I did not experience an OUNCE of harassment from literally anyone at all, I was genuinely blown. Either I was ugly and the Berliners weren’t into it, or cat calling is just not that much of a thing here. Or I was lucky. 

The potency of the harassment meant one thing, Pheromones. 

After the absolute face fuck that was the past weekend I decide to play inspector and read a bunch of biology academic journals on the topic, to figure out if there was a reason for my weekend to go the way that it did. 

The foundation for human olfactory senses are built on the relationship between child and mother from birth, to adolescents when the portfolio of personal smells grows as the child is steadily surrounded by more people. The base of a subject preference is built off of the pheromones their mother releases- in utero through amniotic fluid( curated by genetics as well as the diet of the mother), and the diet during breast feeding. (“Olfaction scaffolds the developing human from neonate to adolescent and beyond”-Benoist Schaal 1, Tamsin K Saxton 2, Hélène Loos 3 4, Robert Soussignan 1, Karine Durand)

Pheromones do not hold a sensible odor but instead a chemical that is released through saliva and sweat that is sensed by receptors in the nasal cavity. 

In the Japanese Journal of Physiology, “ Human Olfactory Contrast Changes during the Menstrual Cycle” by the Department of Biophysical Engineering at Osaka University, several studies were conducted to understand how olfactory perception is affected by the HUMAN menstrual cycle.

While many studies around hormonal olfactory sensation has been reported based off the studies of Rats, it is hard to necessarily find solidified answer for humans. As bodily situation greatly effects results. 

These studies were done on women ages 19-32, none of which were taking oral contraceptives. 

This article comes to the conclusion that Olfactory sensitivity changes through the menstrual cycle. During ovulation senses may be heightened but during or after menstruation, they may become more dull. 

In the cases of a male musk, this leads researchers to believe that during ovulation, subjects may be attracted to the sent, but once menstruation has come into full swing, the scent may be repulsive. 

***

I can not care to properly cite these at the end so you're getting it all now

To pair, Behavioral Ecology textbook, Vol 15 collaborates with Department of Biological and Environmental Science, University of Jyva ̈skyla ̈, Finland, Department of Mental Health and Alcohol Research, National Public Health Institute, Helsinki, Finland, cDepartment of Mathematics and Statistics, University of Jyva ̈skyla and Department of Biology, University of California, Riverside, California, USA.

“Attractiveness of women’s body odors over the menstrual cycle: the role of oral contraceptives and receiver sex”

-Breaking down the assumption that men cannot sense female ovulation as human woman lack the ability to present ovulation status as an evolutionary adaption, here they proposed that human males may have counter-adapted(***out of horniness).

Aside from pheromones, surveys have been done regarding the smell omitting from the vagina created by discharge during ovulation and during the menstrual cycle. The male participants claim that during ovulation the vagina is virtually odorless or the scent is not severe, but during the menstrual cycle it is much stronger. 

A similar study was done after extracting follicular and luteal phase odors from an array of women ovulating, and those menstruating. The men favored the ovulation smells, but this left the question of how this evolutionary adaption works outside of a controlled study where the male is given many options at once. 

“In our study, male raters preferred odors of women whose menstrual cycles were near ovulatory phase. This finding indicates that men can use olfactory cues to detect the reproductive status of women. Female raters showed a trend for this relationship, suggesting that women may also have the ability to detect the reproductive status of other women”

***

Okay this was very interesting but… 

Does this mean my ovulating smell is not sexy but my Menstrual smell is?

I am the odd duck of menstruating people? 

Maybe…

-They later note that time of ovulation is specific to the individual and there is no true generalized time in the menstrual cycle that it can occur-

***Okay but there is no way I ovulate while I’m bleeding… that defeats the whole point. 

Maybe this just means I have an especially yummy smelling period. To anyone that has fucked me on my period… Was I sexier then? 

 

***(IM NOT A SCIENTIST I JUST KNOW HOW TO READ)

Ive accumulated a list of all the incidents that I felt noteworthy. 

-60 year old man buys me a beer

At Alexanderplatz, I tell him I don’t speak German, and put my headphones back in and ignore. He walks away. Not even 5 minutes later he comes back with a beer.

“I bought this for you” 

“No thank you, Im okay”

“No I bought it for you take it” he says while shoving the beer in my face

Excuse me sir. What the fuck was I supposed to do? If I took the free beer (which would have slayed) I would have had to talk to him and sit there

After 5 minutes of back and fourth no thank yous he finally walks away and drinks the beer by himself while staring at me from across the plaza. 

-Pantsing Threat 

Not sure if this one was a form of sexual harassment or just strangeeee Mfers

But I was enjoying my walk down Karl Marx Strasse, staring at myself in my phone making tiktoks because I have no room to care about how stupid I probably look. 

And a man yells in my face and motions that he is going to pull down my pants… but he doesn’t. I almost wish he did that would have been way more interesting. Like why talk about something if you can do it. 

-The Tripping Attempt 

Also not sure if this one is considered harassment or just public bullying but while turning a corner on the street, a man and all almost run into each other, but I saw him before he saw me- being THE NICE HOSPITABLE PERSON I AM- moved out of HIS way. As we actually pass each other, he sticks out his foot to trip me…

 ARE YOU KIDDING ME

THAT IS A FUCKING JOKE

I look back at him in complete disbelief, he meets me gaze, I say “you’re a cunt, fuck off stupid faggot”  making sure that it was loud enough for him to hear me. He quickly turns away and walks faster. 

NO WAY 

A fully grown man just tried to trip me on the street. 

After I moved out of HIS way

Im sorry but that fagot should have moved out of MY way. 

Chivalry is dead and gone six feet under…

He looked like that fruitcake Dwight from walking dead that killed the hyper nervous nurse girl 

Such a fucking crime… 

 

-Man in About Blank needs a shoulder to lean on

In the club, dancing(duh), a man about 6 foot 5 inch dancing(waddling back and fourth) next to me, every 5 seconds of so he looks over at me. So I look back and smile a little to be polite( in at why the fuck do you keep looking at me) way.

He grabs my ears and says 

“Can I put my hand on your shoulder”

“WHY”

He puts his hand on my shoulder anyway

I pull away while laughing cause WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK like bro you got a soli foot on me what kind of support is my shoulder bringing you. At least he asked. But I guess that doesn’t matter when he does it anyway…

“Its not a sexual thing Promise”

“K but why”

Puts his hand back on my shoulder…

Can someone please tell me is this is a type of raver camaraderie, community, nice friendly thing that I just don’t know about… I have a hard time believing that it is but its my only hope. 

WELL god damn, the men of Berlin could instinctively  smell my fertility and wanted to inpregnate me I guess. whether they knew it or not. 

Im curious how this function may adapt if the interest in procreating decreases as steadily as it has been with millennials and Get Z coming to child bearing age.

In my ideal future-topia, men will lose this skill and women ability to sense another woman’s menstrual status will increase. 

With the declining interest in procreation, I hope one day menstruating people can evolve to be able to turn off their ovulation without the hormone deficiency , allowing them to pause their fertility without facing the symptoms of menopause. 

I hope this was interesting for someone- I had fun 

Shake Ass, Bleed Fast, Ovulate Last

FAME💋